Why I wrote this book, the intellectual reasons

Why did I write a novel on Buddha?
Because I sensed there was a connection between Law, physics, music, and the Enlightenment. 

        As a child I would question and hold intelligent conversations on the existence of God or The Great Entity that may be. Growing up one learns about science, physics, history and a schism occurs between what the heart wants to believe which is part of the intuitive process -- and what is explained to the intellect: the head. This barely addresses  the need we have for some great Truth. Years went by and I reached a point where I believed in everything and in nothing. The leaps and bounds of the intellectual world filled me with wonder, but didn't remove the soul-void -- but sometimes gave formidable explanations. I was able to understand certain mundane experiences in an intellectual manner. Einstein's theory of relativity for instance. Before I go on, I must clarify that the first fundamental years of my life were divided into several 3 year segments of country-language-culture hopping. Although each segment was lived by the basic me, each segment molded a separate me whose identity was a little different from the others... and I could feel each one of these identities take on a separate life and exist by itself. later, as I traveled incessantly I observed that I felt a frightening fragmentation of my persona at every significant jet lag. Arriving in the UK some time ago, I wrote the following :
        "It never ceases to amaze me how time contracts and retracts during travel. Here I am in the English countryside where I spent part of my childhood. Summer's green stretches as far as I can see; trees, bushes, meadows; the air is pure and invigorating. I feel as if I have been here for weeks yet it is only a few days since I left New York. That strange feeling of fragmentation is with me again. I recognize the Kyra that lived here although she was very different at that time -- I see her, she is there, part of me yet not part of me, continuing to live that life line that would have been a logical continuity within that frame of existence. It is as if my identity exists in a number of places living parallel lives that I visit, blend in with, then separate from -- and they follow their course. Sometimes I have no difficulty grouping them into the sum total -- the common denominator that is supposed to be Kyra, and sometimes I feel as if I am separated from parts of me that live in a different space/time. Chunks of my life have been so intense in many countries that I feel as though there was no beginning or end to those segments: France, Austria, England, Italy, Japan, LA, NY... When these moments occur, I feel a loss and a  bewilderment."
        Einstein said that time and space are geometrically equivalent in one four-dimensional whole, alongside gravity and matter. All points in space were also points in time, and all moments in time were also points of space. And space-time could be regarded as one giant block of ice in which the whole of physical reality is frozen once and for all. Just as every place in this block universe can be contained, so the same can be said of the past, present and future. Of course, for this to be true, the future must already exist, just like the past and the present.
        I think that what happened was the jet lag reinforced the perception, the natural intuition of the essence of the time space relation. What was needed was the 3rd element, Life, as per the law of Quantum physics, an alive "me" in this case, there to observe its/my perceptions.
        Quantum physics states that in order to understand the above, it must be accepted that an observer, Life, as such, is essential for the above to exist and can influence this reality. Thus Time is not an absolute ideal and recognizes the use of perception of the whole which gives the entirety of this understanding a somewhat Buddhist approach/identity. My thinking is that Buddha must have known this intuitively, for science as explained today did not exist them, although his time was far advanced in mathematical concepts.
        Which brings me to the other questions of interest: Time. How does one solve being pressured by time? How did it manifest itself to Buddha, how did he understand it, see it? I started by taking Sound. We now know that space sound is the sound of the Beginning of Time and that it travels. It is active: we can hear it. Intuitively(?) the Hindus believed in the Tempo of the Universe, manifested in/by Shiva's Dance.
        The Beginning, the Big Bang, being the source of sound is automatically a Time principle as well. The perception of emptiness as being timeless is interrupted by the active time principle of sound. I imaged Siddhartha's awareness of this as Shiva's materialization in the middle of a snow storm -- dancing to the tempo of the Universe as one of the cumulative elements that would be useful at the time of the enlightenment. 
        Again, in Quantum physics, the necessary passive and active nature of the observer that enables the quantum effect is also the element of life, as such. It seems that Buddha, being alive, was able to marry all the above when he achieved Enlightenment.
        But to carry on with my main theme, as I wrote before, that void of the individual, me in this case, remains, and a frightening void to confront, yet we all must, and we all continue to seek answers. I wondered through life assimilating particles of truths, information, religious interpretations, and what not -- and remained awed by the transcendental serenity of Buddha's smile. That smile conveys the mastering of both the intellect, the heart need, a general gestalt of assimilation and more.
        To continue answering the question of why I wrote this book: I wrote it first because I had no choice, and having written it, I only then asked myself the questions I am constantly asked and am now able to answer as I have. The knowledge, the writing, whatever intuitive understanding I may have, has not completely removed the deep sense of isolation that is so reinforced by today's Zeitgeist -- the Zeitgeist of "modern times." However, for the brief moment in the time segment when I was writing, the isolation disappeared. It may well be that the act of creating is the Great Entity's biggest gift to the artist (as it may be) for the "work to be created" takes up 100% of the person's time and space. And when I was finished, the "search" feeling came back with the desire to, the continuing need to, understand why and how and once again look for answers to all the pertinent questions that led me to write this book in the first place. However, with the difference of having a something left over that I cannot as yet define.